March 26th
5:51 PM
38 notes
Reblog
This is a good panel (x)

This is a good panel (x)

#girls with slingshots      #asexual      #relationships     
February 11th
4:16 PM
14 notes
Via
Reblog

aromanticaardvark:

It’s not strictly a song about aromanticism but as an aro-ace I can tell I kind of identify with the lines that go “You love, love, love, when you know I can’t love”, sometimes it makes me feel a bit like a bad person too.

I guess it’s my favorite love song since there aren’t that many you can relate to :)

#asexual      #aromantic      #video      #music      #of monsters and men      #love love love     
November 17th
11:15 AM
56,600 notes
Source
Via
Reblog
equalseleventhirds: the-deviations: firegrowshigher: slutofbabylon: The powers that be do not want me to have a good night.  Man, let’s say you’re at a party, yeah?  And there are people at the party that prefer cake, and people at the party who prefer pie, so the host serves both.  Alright, cool. So you go in for a slice of pie, when suddenly the host CHARGES over and goes “WOAH WOAH WOAH WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING?” “I’m having some pie, man, chill.” “What the hell?  I thought you had cake last time.” “Yeah, I did have cake last time.  But I’m not feeling the cake tonight.  And this is my favorite kind of pie.” “Ohhh no.  I thought you were a CAKE person and now all of a sudden you’re eating pie on me?  You’re confusing me!  Make up your mind!” “What’s the big deal, even?  There’s plenty of both for everyone.” “YOU CAN’T LIKE BOTH CAKE AND PIE.  YOU HAVE TO CHOOSE.” But man, fuck that guy, I’m going to have the pie anyway, who cares if I had cake last week.   And then if that pie is so good that I never want any other dessert for the rest of my life, that doesn’t mean I suddenly never liked that cake that I ate. Actually this metaphor is kind of dumb.  I guess I should just leave it at “fuck you.” No, it’s sweet. In fact, it’s a lovely springboard for the rest of the sexualities. For instance, asexuality: You’re enjoying the party - the music, the conversation - but you just don’t feel like eating cake or pie. Suddenly, the host charges over with some cake he’s sure you’ll love. He knows this cake. It’s not too rich and not too dry. You politely refuse. The party keeps going until the host comes back with a slice of pie, practically shoving it in your hands. You try to refuse again. “Oh come on, what do you want?” “Nothing, I’m fine.” “Are you on a diet?” “No, I just don’t eat pie. Or cake.” “…you had a bad experience with dessert, didn’t you?” “Excuse me?” “Forgive me if I’m getting too personal, but it had to be something traumatic. Did someone spike a baked good of whatever construction with a laxative?” “Fuck no. I just have no desire to eat dessert. I’m sure your pies, cakes, muffins, cookies, waffles, wafers, Nutella sandwiches, what have you…I’m sure they are all lovely. Please, serve them to any and all who would consume them. I’m not one of them. Is that really so hard to comprehend?” “…you just haven’t found the right one.” I sort of really love dessert metaphors for sexuality because some of the things people say about sexuality are so ridiculous, but people really only notice them with the metaphors. Also I love them because I like food and I’m going to eat some dessert now.

equalseleventhirds:

the-deviations:

firegrowshigher:

slutofbabylon:

The powers that be do not want me to have a good night. 

Man, let’s say you’re at a party, yeah?  And there are people at the party that prefer cake, and people at the party who prefer pie, so the host serves both.  Alright, cool.

So you go in for a slice of pie, when suddenly the host CHARGES over and goes “WOAH WOAH WOAH WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING?”

“I’m having some pie, man, chill.”

“What the hell?  I thought you had cake last time.”

“Yeah, I did have cake last time.  But I’m not feeling the cake tonight.  And this is my favorite kind of pie.”

“Ohhh no.  I thought you were a CAKE person and now all of a sudden you’re eating pie on me?  You’re confusing me!  Make up your mind!”

“What’s the big deal, even?  There’s plenty of both for everyone.”

“YOU CAN’T LIKE BOTH CAKE AND PIE.  YOU HAVE TO CHOOSE.”

But man, fuck that guy, I’m going to have the pie anyway, who cares if I had cake last week.  

And then if that pie is so good that I never want any other dessert for the rest of my life, that doesn’t mean I suddenly never liked that cake that I ate.

Actually this metaphor is kind of dumb.  I guess I should just leave it at “fuck you.”

No, it’s sweet. In fact, it’s a lovely springboard for the rest of the sexualities. For instance, asexuality:

You’re enjoying the party - the music, the conversation - but you just don’t feel like eating cake or pie.

Suddenly, the host charges over with some cake he’s sure you’ll love. He knows this cake. It’s not too rich and not too dry. You politely refuse.

The party keeps going until the host comes back with a slice of pie, practically shoving it in your hands. You try to refuse again.

“Oh come on, what do you want?”

“Nothing, I’m fine.”

“Are you on a diet?”

“No, I just don’t eat pie. Or cake.”

“…you had a bad experience with dessert, didn’t you?”

“Excuse me?”

“Forgive me if I’m getting too personal, but it had to be something traumatic. Did someone spike a baked good of whatever construction with a laxative?”

“Fuck no. I just have no desire to eat dessert. I’m sure your pies, cakes, muffins, cookies, waffles, wafers, Nutella sandwiches, what have you…I’m sure they are all lovely. Please, serve them to any and all who would consume them. I’m not one of them. Is that really so hard to comprehend?”

“…you just haven’t found the right one.”

I sort of really love dessert metaphors for sexuality because some of the things people say about sexuality are so ridiculous, but people really only notice them with the metaphors.

Also I love them because I like food and I’m going to eat some dessert now.

#lgbt      #bisexual      #asexual     
October 15th
9:22 AM
2,549 notes
Source
Via
Reblog
travelingworkshop: I made a thing for Coming Out Day

travelingworkshop:

I made a thing for Coming Out Day

#omg      #yes      #asexual     
September 20th
8:49 AM
86 notes
Source
Via
Reblog

greenchestnuts:

codeman38:

In chapter 4 of Understanding Asexuality, Bogaert discusses was one of the reasons that non-asexuals believe that aces can’t possibly make up 1% of the population:

A second explanation is that this skepticism reflects, at least partly, a human tendency to believe that everyone must be just like us. Social psychologists have labeled this bias the false consensus effect (e.g., Ross, Greene, & House, 1977). Thus, if I feel sexual, then everyone else must be sexual too, or just as sexual as I am. So, it is an understandable reaction that some people can’t believe in asexuality, because everyone, at times, is prone to these kinds of false consensus reactions. We all live in our little insulated worlds, and it is sometimes hard to imagine that something very different exists beyond it.

I got to thinking as I was reading this paragraph, and realized something: I’ve also experienced the false consensus effect…but from the exact opposite angle.

For the longest time, I thought that everyone else must be as asexual as I was. Of course, I eventually started figuring out that that wasn’t the case, after seeing more and more incontrovertible evidence to the contrary…but it only truly ‘clicked’ in my brain once I started encountering other aces online and discovering, yeah, the way I experience things with respect to sexuality really isn’t the norm. (And even now, I have to keep reminding myself that no, 99% of people aren’t in fact asexual, but perhaps that’s more autistic stubbornness than anything. :-p)

I know I’m not the only one who’s had this experience. It’s common enough that Redbeard included the following in Possible Signs of Asexuality, Part 3:

You thought that everyone else was just pretending to be interested in sex.

Many asexuals describe having a sort of “Emperor’s New Clothes” view of sex at some point in their lives: That everyone else is just pretending to like it simply because everyone else seems to like it, and they don’t want to be the only one who speaks out and says “No, I’m not really into that.” In this view, a sexually charged culture enforces conformity.

…Y’know, someone ought to do a survey on the false consensus effect among asexuals. I’d love to know how common this experience is.

Yeah, that happened to me. I couldn’t understand why my peers were so interested in sex, when I was a teenager, and in the heights of my teenage snobbery decided it was so they could be popular.

Same with me

#asexual     
April 21st
1:17 AM
0 notes
Reblog
A message from Anonymous
i'm a panromantic grey-ace and i feel trapped and smothered in a romantic, sexual relationship and all i want is a queerplatonic partner to be roommates with me to sleep with and hang out with and be friends with :(

Oh no D: ahh sorry I don’t really know what to say DD:  Have you told the person in this relationship about your identity and that you want to get out of the relationship?

#ask      #Anon      #asexual      #queerplatonic     
12:25 AM
5 notes
Reblog

I’m starting to wonder if I’m aromantic?

For a while I identified as grey-romantic, basing that on the fact that I’ve had romantic relationships before.  But I’m starting to wonder if they were actually “romantic” relationships.  At the time I called them that, maybe because that’s all I knew.  Idk, I don’t know how to explain my thoughts on my past relationships except that they might not have been romantic ones.

I just want a queerplatonic partner who will live with me forever, who wants to kiss and cuddle sometimes, and someone how loves animals, plants, nature, and the environment as much as I do.

#me      #asexual      #asexuality      #aromantic      #queerplatonic     
April 15th
11:44 PM
0 notes
Reblog
A message from swellyandbiscuits
HI! I hope you don't think I'm just some random ignorant girl with all my outrageous questions. I'm more of a young lady that is very curious about the world we live in. And I'm not sure if you get this a lot but I would love to understand the life for an asexual individual. What are your interests? Is there anything about the female or male body or attitude that you find attractive? When you give answers I'm sure I'll have more questions if your ok with that. Thanks for the consideration!

Hi!  Don’t worry, you’re not ignorant and these questions aren’t outrageous :)  I’m always open to questions about asexuality.

So for the first question, do you mean general interests or interests related to asexuality?

For the second question, even though I’m not sexually attracted to anyone, I still find people attractive in other ways.  As far as I know, I’m also grey-romantic so I usually don’t find people romantically attractive.  But I often find people aesthetically attractive.  Aesthetic attraction is like appreciating someone’s beauty, good looks, etc. like how someone would appreciate a painting or someone.  I don’t think I can really pinpoint what I find aesthetically attractive, although people who express their gender as (soft) masculine or androgynous I usually find aesthetically attractive.

I hope those are good answers.  And feel free to ask me more!  I don’t mind :)

#ask      #swellyandbiscuits      #asexual      #asexuality     
7:02 PM
121 notes
Via
Reblog

Asexuality Identity and Experiences Survey - Call for Ace participants

acesecrets:

Julia Prims, of the University Of Colorado Boulder, is conducting research into asexuality for their honors thesis:

“This study is intended to examine the cultural dismissal of asexuality and self-esteem, depression, and self-concept in asexually identified individuals. You are being asked to participate in this study because you either identify as asexual or have ties to the asexual community. You will be one of 500 people to participate in this study.

During the course of this study, you will be asked to fill out a questionnaire which will ask you various questions about your identity and experiences as an asexual. If you do not identify as asexual, you will be asked to skip some questions. You will then complete three psychological surveys measuring depression, self-esteem, and self-concept. This study should take approximately 20-45 minutes.”

 If you identify as asexual, demisexual, grey-a, or as anywhere on the asexual spectrum, please consider taking part in this quick and easy survey.

The plan is to publish the paper in a scientific journal and, potentially, present it at conferences.

Please take the survey here

Please complete and/or reblog to raise awareness of this project. 

signal boost

#asexual     
5:35 PM
419 notes
Via
Reblog

FACT: Asexuals have an insatiable thirst for Disney films.

#yes      #true      #asexual